Cabin Fever

So I added it up and in the last 2 weeks I have left the vicinity of my home four times. Three of these occasions were trips to the Doctor or to urgent care. The other was a trip to my school to take a test that required my presence in the testing center. Today I ventured out to the Urgent Care Center, to attend to an injury of Landis', in our busted vehicle with a borrowed car seat. Our wagon has developed a transmission problem and so Nick has been driving our other vehicle to work. Of course the vehicle Nick drove had both car seats in it. Fortunately Teilee was at the preschool with Nick today and so I only had to obtain 1 car seat. My neighbor was willing to let me borrow her son's car seat and despite it being for children ages 4 and up I took her up on the offer. The urgent care was only a mile or so away and I almost considered walking or biking, but since I am still ill I wasn't sure that I would make it. So with Landis in the big kid car seat, (and despite his pain was loving it) we drove the few blocks to the urgent care. I thought that he had possibly injured his wrist as he was refusing to use it and was fussing anytime he moved it. I was thinking it must have been a similar injury to the 'sublaxation of the radial head' injury, or dislocated elbow, that he had a few months ago. It was even the same arm. After arriving and checking in we waited. We waited until we were shown to a private room, where Landis played for a while and then fell asleep nursing. The Doctor came in after he fell asleep and proceeded to check out his wrist. He barely moved during her examination so I woke him up. Well......after waking he was using his hand, wrist, everything was just fine. I guess he just needed to sleep it off! I suppose these are just mundane details, but like I said I haven't been out much:)

School has been on the forefront of my thinking lately, but I have had little to give to the venture. In fact I have decided to avoid the work of applying for the latest round of scholarships. Priorities are......Get Well......Get Family Back to a Routine.........Pass My Classes.........and well I can't think much past that. The first priority is proving to be a little too challenging. At the moment I can't even imagine what it is like to not experience severe fatigue, painful stuffy head, and extreme exhaustion.

On a brighter note...the seeds that we planted are growing nicely in our dining room. The sunflower plants are the most impressive, but I like the corn plants who clearly have outgrown the bottoms of the containers. We just used the plastic containers that strawberries come in to plant some seeds (sunflowers, corn, bell peppers, tomatoes, and herbs). The corn roots have swarmed out of the holes in the bottom of the container. I have no idea (and don't really care) if these seeds will make it to the spring planting. I guess I figured at the very least it would be fun to watch these plants grow. Hopefully this weekend we will get to the repotting of these plants and will be able to experience their potential!

pics

A couple of pics from the great Brunson event! Who can spot Joe in the silly family picture?

Back

We are back and bumpin'! We had a great trip. I think I could have stayed away for at least another month. Although it was getting difficult to do school while on vacation. Who wants to sit in front of a computer screen and do homework when you could be playing out on the prairie? We have basically recovered from our illness after the trip. Yes I think we pick up something from the party:) Although with my sinus canals it was bound to happen and I am still in shock that we managed to be around everybody for a week and had no illness until we all parted ways.

Okay I wrote this a while ago and never finished. I have been ill for the past two weeks. These sinus canals of mine have even my doctor saying, "What gives?". Actually my doctor said, after getting the results back from a sinus CT, "those sinuses are nasty!" So while they are recommending surgery, I am trying to downsize my cat collection while simultaneously assaulting my nasal canals with every natural remedy known to man. I am shoving water and salt up there, while taking an expectorant to force stuff out, holding my head over steaming buckets of tea tree oil, taking several rounds of antibiotics, and more. Every day I see a slight improvement in my acute sinus infection, but I am told that my chronic infection will remain until I can get a nose job. There probably isn't a remedy in the world that can fix my deviated septum and underdeveloped sinus canal but I keep trying. The last few weeks have been a struggle to survive. I unfortunately don't have any sick leave and this means that Nick has had to stay home a lot. Fortunately for us an angel named Grandma descended from Kansas to help care for me and the kids, while Nick finished up the last days at his job. Oh yes did I mention that through all of this Nick got laid off from one of his jobs. He still is working early mornings at UPS and this week he started work a new day job at Teilee's preschool. It will mean a little less pay and we will have to find ways to supplement our income, but what else is new! Nick is fitting right in with this job, unfortunately it is only temporary through March and then he will have to find a different day time job. Who knows...maybe he will get his driver's position at UPS by then (keep your fingers crossed). In the meantime, I have to get well. I have not functioned normally for several weeks. I didn't even get out of bed for an entire week. With the kids to care for and a household to run, let alone school to attend, this has been an unacceptable amount of time to be out. I have an appointment with the Ear nose and throat specialist in a week and a half. This was of course the earliest appointment they had, (it's not their sinuses that are crippling their lives). I have found that the general attitude toward my chronic illness has been one of........well insensitivity. I completely understand that it is hard to comprehend living with constant pain, fatigue, and headaches. I just wish that there was more effort to understand by the doctors, is it not their education that focuses on healing illnesses? I suppose it is difficult to address their own failure or rather inability to cure a simple sinus infection. I guess it is not so simple after all! I suppose it is just frustrating that I have known for 2 months that this was a serious issue that would need more than the typical round of antibiotics to cure. While my doctor had to wait for the validating CT scan to take any action. I guarantee that if this were his illness he would have seen results and been healed at least a month ago. Really I like my doctor, I think he is attentive, understanding, open minded, and generally very caring. I guess no one will ever be able to live up to my standards (Dr. Dan set the bar too high)! Dr. Dan is still in Greeley, not for much longer, and he can't get me in for an appointment until April. Maybe he will have a miracle cure. Here's to hoping...and to having health.......and to being able to go for a walk. Soon.......

Change and neatness

I am a person who enjoys change. The layout of furniture in every room of our house is rearranged at least every three weeks. One room in our house has been repurposed at least 5 times in the last 2 years. Each time requiring complete moves of furniture out of the room and into another. This little condition of mine is only exacerbated by the size of our domain. In small spaces every square inch has to be utilized. Sometimes when a category of items, or a person, becomes to large for the existing arrangement the space must be shifted to accommodate the growth. I have worked hard at purging and not allowing my things to grow in number as attachment to possessions can be very damaging to the soul.:) As of recently Landis was sleeping in his crib in our office/craftroom/storage room. I finally gave in and decided he needed to own the space. (At least for the next 3 months!) This has meant consolidating all craft and office items into the living room. We happen to have a lack of storage in this house (as Delta can attest to) and the storage items are creating the biggest issue. However, for those of you that know me you understand that I am taking much delight in the organizational problem solving. Another issue that arises from my blessed curse is the design of each room. I am learning to successfully paint each area to allow for change of occupancy. Although this weekend I am hoping to achieve a new hue in my room. (White is becoming increasingly difficult to tolerate.) This new color will mean a permanent residence of adults (or maybe an office) but will not be a scheme that a child could enjoy. The commitment of this is a new chapter in my life and in my home.

There are lots of transitions occurring right now. This probably stems from the availability of a little more time: post holiday, pre semester, Landis a bit more self entertaining and self sufficient, and Teilee back in preschool a few hours a week. Things that have been postponed for about 2 years (like organizing the file cabinet) are being completed hourly. Of course I know that it will be short lived as once I am back in school I will be swamped again, but just catching up a little on our house and home is awesome! Also it means that I won't have to apologize to the masses that will be visiting here in a few weeks, about the condition of the our home. Smallness I can't help, but neatness I can!!!

old post

I found a couple of old post and have no idea why I didn't post them. Check out Oct. 11th's and 19th's post and Dec. 21st's they are new/old.

Congratulations to Katie and Joe new members of the deuce club!

Nick is working some crazy hours! Last night I hadn't even gone to sleep when he had to get up to go to work. He also went to bed way too late last night, but hopefully next week he will be able to sleep a bit more!

Landis apparently wanted to follow in his fathers footsteps and barely sleep more than an hour at a time. Of course this means that I must nurse him constantly just to get my own sleep.

I used to always be a chronic night owl, now I am a fall asleep standing up kinda gal. Today I found myself wiping furiously at the apparent mascara rings under my eyes. Being frustratingly unsuccessful I realized that I had not worn mascara and those were indeed the dark non-sleeping circles that I have earned as a mother. These bruise colored crescents, that no amount of makeup can 'freshen up', scream "Tired Mom Here!". Although, they are not out of place on this tousled uncut hair, unbrushed teeth, unwashed clothes of a person that I am. They only add to the ensemble that declares my latest station in life. Once discovered though I only admire them with a perverse since of accomplishment. Like my stretchmarks, and my stretching breasts, I have earned these. My progress as a woman can be traced across my body like counting the rings of a tree. My still protruding belly indicating the rude way in which my son was taken from my being. My uneven breasts a symbol of my dedication to the nutrition of my offspring. These are my battle scars, my road map, my mark of motherhood of which I am proud to declare. In all its beauty this is me now.

I wrote this awhile ago. It is probably unfinished yet, but the inspiration has vanished and so I am posting it as is.

The past month or so I have been exhausted and run down. First I suspected that it was just post semester sleepiness. Then I thought it was weather inducing Fibro. Then I thought I better go see a doctor, I am barely functioning. Turns out I have a 'raging' sinus infection. Oh, that's what that pain was. I have learned to tune out my aches and pains so well. It is survival instinct and truly necessary or I would be bed ridden for sure. It does have its down sides as I have several times ignored a migraine until I was hunched over the toilet throwing up. I try to catch that one sooner now. Honestly when you have constant aches and pain it is hard to determine what is foreign and fixable, and what is normal. I should be recovered from this latest sinus infection and ready to bust a move soon.

My friend just told me about this home remedy to prevent and help recover from illness. Once a week you put a drop or two of warm garlic oil in your ears. If you are already sick you put a whole dropperful every hour for at least three hours in the ear. (Make sure to insulate properly with a cotton ball.) Last week Landis seemed to be on the road to another ear infection and so we did the full dropper treatment and it seemed to help. Needless to say I am smelling a lot like garlic this week!

Here are a few shots of some of the fun stuff I made for Christmas this year.

The hat in the picture with Landis. And yes...that is Landis' new red purse.

This is a pillow case I made for Teilee out of her old shirts (super fast and cheap!).

These are scarfs that I made for all the great kids we know and love!!->

These are some of the gift tags I made for Delta's tag swap.

Had to include a random pic of Teilee with Santa. This year we took her because she asked us to. (I have always found it wierd that we take our kids screaming and kicking to go sit on some strange mans lap. What happened to stranger danger?)

Happy New Year!

Loving the Christmas Music!

Gearing up for Christmas.....way behind in my gifts.....way behind in my school preparations......way behind in my 'home work'.........totally lost all of my to-dos.



I found out that I only need 2 more classes in order to obtain my second Associates degree from Front Range. Truly that is not my goal here at this school, but it will help to get all the classes I can at this cheaper rate before heading to CSU. Now I really have to get to work on getting to CSU. Lots of things to figure out like: How in the f*** can I do this? Holy cow, last semester was rough, and I have a lot more to go. I wish the kids were older, but if they were than I would wish that I had my degree already. I know why I choose to go back now, but man I just wish it would get easier.



I decided (Nick agrees) that next year we will celebrate the Winter Solstice instead of Christmas. Also this will mean that we can celebrate the Summer Solstice too!! All of my religious research has led to the same conclusion for me. Do what feels right!

The kids are sick again. Tonight Landis was having a hard time keeping his balance and I am concerned about the possibility of a serious ear infection again! Last week Landis had a quick trip to the ER concerning a subluxation of the radial head (or something like that). It is called 'nursemaids elbow' and basically consist of the joint in the elbow becoming dislodged from the ligament that holds it in place. That is my basic understanding, all I know is that when pulling big sisters hair, from the front of the shopping cart while she is in the back, make sure that she can't grab your arm and pull really hard!! I guess it is really common and also likely to occur again if we aren't super super careful. Baby acrobatics have been put on hold unless the child can be firmly gripped only by the torso! Scared the sh** out of me to see him in so much pain with a sorta limp arm. At least the ER visit lasted only an hour (gotta be a record). As soon as the doctor was able to finagle the joint ligament back into place (took two painful tries) Landis was better in about 30 secs (no meds). He went from crying and laying on my chest to wriggling to get out of my grip, running down the hall in his little hospital gown, and waving bye to everyone (with the injured arm).

All I want for Christmas/Solstice is two healthy kids! I can't wait to post pictures of all the cool gifts I have been able to make so far. I always have such big plans! Maybe this year I will be able to finish them, but if that is to happen I probably had better go get to work!!!